TynedaleNLP

nev@tynedalenlp.co.uk
  (07547 478858)

Why you don’t need will power...

When we’re trying to change something, some behaviour which may be giving us poor results or some thinking which is unhelpful for us, there is a tendency to focus our attention on what we are giving up and what we stand to lose in doing so. Smokers will often mourn the passing of that ‘hit’ which will calm them down, or that feeling of anticipation in opening a new pack of cigarettes and the perceived reward: The errant dieter can positively wax lyrical about the forbidden chocolate cake and torment themselves with memories of taste and texture.

What they all claim to have is will power...or not!
I have the will power to not smoke...to not eat the wrong things...to deny myself something which I know I shouldn’t really do...

Focusing on the ‘will power’ inadvertently focuses on the behaviour you want to change.

Telling yourself ‘I will not smoke’ will automatically invoke a memory of what it was like to smoke. In order to make sense of the sentence the mind must first find a reference point, and if that’s in your experience you’re going to feel those sensations. You will remind yourself of inhaling deeply and satisfyingly; you will remember how smooth and sensuous that silky chocolate can really be. You may not realise this, as many of these functions happen deep within our unconscious, but it is exactly these deep seated habits of thought which drive our motivations, beliefs and values.

Changing your focus – focusing on what you want – gives you a greater chance of success in whatever goal you have set. You may have decided to quit smoking, but for what purpose, what do you want by quitting? To be healthy, to be able to breathe, to be more fragrant? Whatever it is you desire, the focus on the goal is the key.
It sounds obvious, but to focus on what you want helps create a clearer picture of who you can be and allows that possibility to crystallise.
 
It’s good to move away from something unhelpful, but it’s even better to have something positive to move towards.
Insert body text here...